Tag Archives: children
Riding the Cold-cut Train
If you worked somewhere for thirty five years, would you be upset IRATE if all your subordinates did for you was gather around the water cooler and pitch in for a cold cut platter and sheet cake from Costco? You … Continue reading
Filed under People are Idiots, Things That Upset Me
Crackheads Before Babies
Just when I was starting to feel completely uninspired…There is nothing like a trip to the emergency room to get my inspirational juices flowing. An eight and a half hour debacle provides one with the necessary life epiphanies: #1. Personal … Continue reading
Filed under Archive Posts, People are Idiots, Things That Upset Me
What They Don’t Teach You in College
It only takes small and obvious things to set me off, like when you walk into your place of employment and there is this bovine human ulcer sitting in the main entrance who’s only form of communicate is a grunt due to … Continue reading
Filed under Things That Upset Me
Damn Jenius
Would you rather: A.Chaperon the Senior Prom B.Give yourself your own appendectomy Think hard about this; it is a difficult decision. As appealing as option B sounds, I decided to take the high road, set myself up for a challenge … Continue reading
Filed under American Youth, People are Idiots
Licking Doorknobs for a Day Off
Question: What has the ability to reach the masses, the hysteria of McCarthyism and the death toll of sky diving? AIDS? Nope, too 1980′s. World Hunger? Nope, higher deaths per square inch of sub-Saharan Africa than the entire sky ventures combined. … Continue reading
Filed under American Youth, Things That Upset Me
Everyone Gets a Trophy
What is this world coming to? At what point did we ever think that our children and schools would be on the verge of implosion? Correct: rotting from the inside out. Students running amuck, waving guns and gang signs around a rite of passage into grade 10, rather than hard work and decent grades, not to mention comradely and self respect. But, we wonder why things are so fucked up and why we have produced a disgusting society of maladjusted and unaccountable human beings. We can’t tell Johnny that he is anti-social and “not trying hard enough” or even the worst of it, that he is just plain fucking LAZY. So, Johnny just skates by and we praise him for things he should do in the first place, like come to school. Good idea. Give the whole team a damn trophy just for showing up and reward those who can’t perform because in real life, everyone gives a shit about your shortcomings. Continue reading
Filed under American Youth
Coloring Outside of the Lines
Is this what life is about? Sensible shoes, steady jobs, a savings account and …RESPONSIBILITY? Who said responsibility is synonymous with reproductive organs and chapels? Said whom? Are we all predestined to a life of picket fences, spacious SUV’s … Continue reading
Filed under Archive Posts
Glorified Janitor
One of the highlights of being in the reputable profession of education is being someone’s bitch. I enjoy student’s coming into my class and pulling the shades down, forcing out the only remnants of life beyond these classroom walls … Continue reading
Filed under American Youth, Archive Posts
Nuts: They Changed My Life
Mr. P was an interesting man. He had funny little colloquialisms and mannerisms, which was great for a teacher in a blow-off class. I remember little of what he taught me, except the effects of polyester, which in any case could be a valuable lesson. My only memory of gym class is Mr. P wearing too tight polyester that offensively showcased his nut-sack. Now, this was before the days of sue happy Americans and teachers having inappropriate relationships with students. Nonetheless, I am traumatized.
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Filed under American Youth, Archive Posts
